Vox Ex Turbatio

A New Beginning... this time, for real!

2009-01-26T23:18:00.010-05:00

So I have this blog, have for over a year now, but never really had any guiding principle for it, nothing in particular to blog about. And I'm not disciplined enough as a writer to commit to it. But now I have something. See, I'm preaching semi-regularly now, and though they aren't completely true to what actually comes out of my mouth, I have the manuscripts thereof. So I have decided I'm gonna start posting my sermons for those who may be interested. Also will probably be attaching some random YouTube video. Random as in it doesn't connect to the sermon that is, not a completely random selection from that beast.

As kind of an introductory note, and reiterating the above: when I actually preach these, I don't hold completely to the manuscript. I add, delete, change words around on the fly. Never significantly so that the manuscript becomes wrong, but if it sounds weird aloud or reads weird, well, I may have changed it.

So without further ado, here is my sermon that I preached at Maryville Friends Church in Maryville, TN on Sunday, January 25. Sermon length was between 16 and 20 minutes if I timed it right.

Big for Our Britches

25 January 2009

Maryville Monthly Meeting of Friends

(open reading Acts 2:1-6)

So here the disciples are,

50 days after Jesus rose from the dead,

and ten days after he's ascended.

They've picked somebody to pick Judas' place

and now they're waiting, gathered expectantly waiting.

Tradition tells us that it was the Upper Room,

the same room where they'd had the Last Supper.

All the Bible says is that they were together in one place,

but the Upper Room works for me.

Jesus promised them,

right before he ascended,

that the Holy Spirit would come and give them power.

So they chose a new disciple and started waiting.

This wasn't the first time

they'd been promised something special;

if you recall the book of John,

just before Jesus is arrested

he has a long conversation with the disciples

and promises them a Comforter, the Holy Spirit.

It's from these chapters in John

that Friends take our name,

because Jesus told the disciples

“I no longer call you slaves, but friends.”

So these men and women,

the Twelve and all of Jesus' other followers,

are gathered waiting on the Spirit.

And it arrives.

And oh, does it arrive.

I'm not talking the still, small voice that Elijah heard on the mountain.

No, this time the Holy Spirit came

like a mighty rushing wind

and ignited these people's hearts and tongues for God.

Now, some of our more extreme Pentecostal friends interpret this

to mean we should all be speaking in languages we don't understand.

I can't say I completely agree,

but far be it for me to call into question somebody's relationship with the Spirit.

Regardless, haven't you ever wondered

what it might be like to suddenly have that sort of radical gift from the Spirit?

To just start speaking the words God gives you

and not just by speaking clearly but have everybody understand you

no matter where they come from?

Personally, I praise God if I'm just doing the “speaking clearly” part.

Think about it for a moment;

here these followers are,

men and women uneducated,

many of them from the most backwards part of the land.

And there's all these people gathered in Jerusalem

from different parts of the Roman Empire for the Festival of Weeks,

and they're all hearing their own language from these Galileans?

Talk about power from the Spirit!

No wonder 3000 people were converted that day.

The timing was pretty much perfect on God's part, too.

I mean, of course the timing was perfect,

God's timing is always perfect, right?

But the big festival in Jerusalem,

the holiday that so many Jews had come back home for?

There's a bunch of names for it

since it's so old, but the main Hebrew name is Shavuot.

Now, on the one hand it was a harvest festival,

celebrating the gathering in of the grains.

But there was and still is for Jews a deeper meaning.

You see, Shavuot commemorates the day

on which God gave Moses the Ten Commandments on Mount Sinai

and therefore marked the anniversary of their covenant.

In other words, on the day that all the Jews, including Jesus' followers,

were celebrating God giving Israel the Law through Moses,

that same day the Holy Spirit empowered the disciples

to preach the Good News of Christ.

Talk about your parallels and your perfect timing!

And yet we know that the Holy Spirit that empowered Peter and John,

empowered Mary Magdalene and Mary of Bethany,

still works to empower us today and continues to speak.

We as Friends are particularly aware of this

with our open worship and our belief in continuing revelation.

When Jesus' promised the disciples in the Gospels

that they would do even greater things than he,

he wasn't kidding.

Well, ok, this is all well and good,

but what's my point with all this?

None of this is exactly new, right?

Well here's the other thing;

just because we are given this power by the Spirit,

it doesn't mean we can just use it willy-nilly.

We need to be very careful that we seek God's guidance

in what we do and say in God's name.

Because that's the other thing

about this story of Pentecost.

Jesus' followers were waiting patiently for guidance.

They weren't out trying

to do things on their own.

Even Peter,

that old blowhard

who was always putting his foot in his mouth,

Even Peter was waiting patiently.

I think there's an important lesson there,

and one that often gets overlooked

because we're all so focused

on the tongues of fire and the mighty rushing wind.

You see, even thought they'd been promised power,

these men and women knew they hadn't received it yet,

they hadn't gotten too big for their britches

that they thought they could do it on their own.

It's a very Quaker lesson, too;

“we're gonna sit together in silence,

patiently waiting for the Spirit to come and give us the message.”

They knew there was a message coming,

but they weren't forcing it.

One of the friends that I've made at seminary

has an expression that she'll say whenever somebody's

talking abut needing to make a decision.

“Don't outrun your Guide” she says,

reminding us that everything we do should be under

the guidance and care of the Holy Spirit.

Now, I'll freely admit that this isn't very easy.

Relying on God for guidance and strength,

and not trusting our own abilities and wisdom?

Even when we know this,

we know how much we should rely on God,

how easy is it to get full of ourselves?

I know I've done it,

tried to rely on my own understanding instead of

properly trusting in God's guidance.

It's natural, it's normal, it's a very human thing to do,

and it's something we all have to work so hard to overcome,

don't we?

Especially in today's modern world,

with it's emphasis on being empowered,

on being independent and self-sufficient,

Giving up our rights and submitting

to God's will and guidance,

well, it's almost un-American if you listen to some people.

And yet,

you can look through the Bible,

you can look through history,

and see what happens when we rely on our own strength.

Think of King Solomon,

how magnificently he started.

Even today,

people remember Solomon for being so wise,

a wisdom he asked for and received from God.

But... then what happened?

Do we remember the rest of the story?

Solomon got too big for his britches,

he turned away from God because

he thought he had it all figured out.

So he started worshiping idols.

Even King David,

a man after God's own heart,

made this critical mistake.

It certainly wasn't God's idea

for David to lust after Bathsheba

and have her husband sent to the front lines to die.

Or look at more recent examples,

I'm sure we can all think of someone who

clearly had abilities and gifts from God

but who outran the guidance of the Spirit.

You see Friends,

we're not just called to use our Spirit-given power

for the Kingdom of God without direction and as we see fit.

Just as important is that we seek out God's guidance

and that when necessary, as it may often be,

we submit our will to God's will.

Early Quakers spoke a lot about

taking up our cross and following Christ.

They also spoke of “notions,”

and the dangers that were involved when we

follow our notions instead of God's will.

Even today,

when we gather in silent worship

and we listen for the Holy Spirit

to give us a message,

We have to be careful that

what we hear isn't our own desires

but actually comes from God.

We are reminded in 1^st John 4:1,

“Dear friends, do not believe every spirit,

but test the spirits to see whether they are from God,

because many false prophets have gone out into the world.”

Just as the early Quakers,

so should we, when we feel we have a leading,

test that leading and that message,

making sure that it is truly from God.

As we listen and pray, we ask,

“Is this truly from God?”

“Does this work that I feel called to

actually conform with God's plan

or just my own desires?”

And if it sticks with you,

if it burns inside you, growing stronger like a holy fire

and doesn't just pass away,

Then you have a very good indication.

So Friends,

when I challenged us last week

to continue doing God's work,

We need also to remember that the

emphasis and focus of our action

needs to be guided by God

through the Holy Spirit.

Because if we fly off the handle,

doing our own thing

and counting on our own guidance

to use the power that the Spirit gives us all,

We can end up very disappointed,

or very hurt,

or hurting someone else.

But this command of Jesus',

this reminded in the Gospel of John that

“You are my friends, if you do what I command you,”

is not just a warning and a reminder

that we shouldn't rely on our own strength.

No Friends,

this is a blessing.

We worship and follow a Savior God

who loves us and doesn't force us

to figure things out on our own.

The Holy Spirit promised by Jesus

is not just a source of power and gifts to the Disciples

and to us.

No, the Spirit is also

the Comforter, the Sustainer.

You know the old song,

“What a Friend We Have in Jesus.”

This is the most wonderful thing

about a God who provides guidance,

direction, and support for us in all our days.

This world is big, confusing,

complicated, noisy, and difficult.

Especially today,

with all the challenges and problems we face,

we should be so glad that we can turn to the Holy Spirit for direction.

When I think of so many people,

including some of my friends from college,

who don't believe in God,

I sometimes feel an overwhelming sense of sorrow for them,

Not anger.

I wonder how terrifying and confusing

this world must be, having to face it entirely alone,

or only with other flawed, frail humans to turn to.

True, we are working to grow in our spiritual maturity,

to become more Christlike,

but how many times in the Gospels

Do you see Jesus taking time

to go to God in prayer, seeking guidance and support?

How comforting and empowering it is,

to know we have someone to turn to for guidance.

And this guidance takes so many forms,

whether the words of people and times long gone,

or the direction and guidance of mentors with us today,

Friends and family through whom

God can speak.

That's one of the reasons I think

communities of faith,

places like Maryville Friends,

are so important.

It's people gathered together

in common service of God

that God can work through

to support and guide all of us.

We can all think of times and places,

people and events that God used

to guide us and comfort us in difficult times,

or times when we weren't sure where to go with our lives.

These are difficult and troubling times,

but we as Christians know we can rely on God's guidance

in all things.

And we know that when we

take it to the Lord in prayer,

we will find our true purpose and

our greatest peace and satisfaction.

So Friends, as we enter into a time of prayerful communion with God,

remember that, whether we're getting too big for our britches,

or we need God's support through difficult and confusing decisions,

What we are called to do is listen

for the movement and power of the spirit.

Whether that comes in

the inward movement of open worship,

the caring voice of a loved one or community of believers,

Or whether, like those men and women at Pentecost,

the direction of God comes in a mighty rushing wind.

And now for your unrelated YouTube video, enjoy!

Revamp

2008-08-27T02:44:00.004-04:00

I've been somewhat 'meh' towards "Trickster's Tales" for awhile now. Doesn't *really* describe me since I'm more of the straight man than the comic, and considering the atmosphere from which Paleface Coyote sprung, just a bit of an uncomfortable reminder now and again. So now Vox ex Turbatio (look it up :-P). Considered Vox ex Vacuus but didn't think I really wanted to be saying that about myself. Changed the address too which might be slightly annoying but hopefully not much.

Reminiscing Part 2 (of many)

2008-08-22T02:16:00.003-04:00

So, I've come to the conclusion that four cartoon intros/reminisces are too many to fit in one blog post. It's too unwieldy, and there's more to say than what I did say. So I'm gonna try doing one at a time, see how that works. 'Course, that might take me awhile, but oh well. Gives me something to strive for, and (relatively) new content every now and then.

Captain Planet: Originally broadcast September 1990 to May 1996

Oh yes, I went there. The ultimate in enviro-hippie cartoons, Captain Planet was about five kids with magic rings who, when needed, could summon "Earth's greatest hero." No, not Superman, but Captain Planet. Each of the kids came from a different part of the globe (Africa, North America, USSR, Asia, South America), giving the show a pretty balanced cast for an early-90s cartoon - the American, of course, was from New York City. The Soviet girl, later had her origin changed to "Eastern Europe" after the USSR collapsed - something of which I had only the very vaguest of notions. More interestingly, each ring gave command/power over one of the classical elements (Earth, Fire, Wind, Water) - with the fifth being labeled "Heart" - which always seemed to me kinda vagueish and undefined, wishy-washy, but also potentially the most powerful. Sure, the Earth guy can shape the very ground you stand on, the Fire guy can blast you with flaming destruction, the Wind girl can create a tornado, and the Water girl can potentially do all sorts of nasty things. But "Heart," from what I can recall, was some sort of empathic/mental connection type thing... usually used to make villains feel bad, or get some local critters to help, or be a general moral conscious type thing. On the other hand... it could also be used to, oh, inflame mobs, influence public opinion, even if only subtly... maybe even mind control. How fortunate that the kid with the "Heart" ring was also the most innocent/pure, morally upright... etc., etc. And of course the different elements fit with each kid's personality... steady and reliable African dude, hotheaded American, piercing/logical Russian, flexible/adaptable Asian-of-unspecified-origin (though likely Chinese I'd guess).

Other good things... oh yeah, I really wanted their solar-powered plane. And I never could figure out which ring I'd have wanted. There was a particular episode I vaguely remember that dealt with drug addiction which I found a little bit frightening.... granted, I was a little kid, but I seem to remember one of the Planeteers actually becoming an addict. After all, one of the show's messages was keeping yourself pollution-free as well. Also, I was annoyed by the PSA's at the end of each show... I'd've preferred more time for actual show and plot, and they were boringly repetitive.

Anyway though... can you imagine what people would be saying if this show debuted today? "Bleeding-heart liberals and their godless heathen tv shows..." Seriously... kids recruited by "the Spirit of the Earth" and fighting to save the planet from caricatures of all the classic environmentalist bugaboos? But you know what? I watched it, and if I'd had kids then, I'd want them to be watching something like this too. Great escapist stuff and with an important core message that Smokey the Bear would be proud of.

Oh... and Linka (the Russian girl) was probably one of my earlier TV crushes as a little eight year old. Yeah, she was a cartoon... and?

Bonus material: The end credits, and the theme song that probably is Cap's most lasting contribution to pop culture.

Reminiscing... ahh, childhood

2008-08-17T03:34:00.003-04:00

Ever get nostalgic about your childhood? I do, especially recently about the TV shows I watched when I was a kid. This is helped in large part of course by the magical creations of Youtube and Wikipedia, which have allowed me to relive, in some small measure, a bit of those good old shows. I've been able to find the old show intros... and in more than one case, entire episodes! And now I feel like sharing. Of course, there's a lot of shows out there, and I don't feel like inundating... so I'm gonna do a few at a time. These are in no particular order, nor with any particular theme. Now, let's see if I can figure out this whole "embedding" thing...

1. Chip N' Dale Rescue Rangers - First Run March 1989 to November 1990

This old Disney cartoon is one of my earliest and fondest memories of TV cartoons. I would have been four and five when the show first aired, and probably remember it more from reruns on the Disney Afternoon after-school block. This 'toon featured a detective/rescue agency headed up by the two chipmunk title characters who went around doing good deeds for other animals and solving cases that "go slipping through the cracks." The show also starred Gadget, a brilliant girl mouse inventor, a strong-arming Australian mouse named Monterey Jack (as in the cheese, natch), and Zipper the fly - who didn't speak intelligibly but tended to be the funniest (to me, as a four, five, six, seven year old). As with most Disney cartoons, lots of humor and slapstick, but I also remember a lot of teamwork and friendship messages, especially about being gentle with one another's foibles and perseverance.

2. Batman: The Animated Series - First Run September '92 to September '95

This cartoon redefined, to a large extent, what American cartoons could be and introduced an entire generation of young people to the Batman character. Dark and moody with a penchant for serious drama and little slapstick, I could probably rewatch this cartoon as a 20-something and still really like it. I would've been 7, almost 8, when Batman came on the air, and 10 when it ended, and that sounds about right, though I no doubt caught it in re-runs as well. The art deco and rather timeless look to Gotham (relatively high tech, but police in zeppelins for example) really appealed to me, since Batman was very clearly in the "real world" but still separate and comic-booky enough. Aside from Batman (and Robin, Batgirl, Alfred) however, the villains of Batman were particularly well-done, especially the Joker and Mr. Freeze. This particular cartoon spawned a series of 'toons roughly linked, with the last show not ending until 2006.

3/4. Where in the World/Where on Earth is Carmen Sandiego - September '91 to October '96 and February '94 to January '99, respectively

If the Oregon Trail was the definitive early computer game(s) for kids my age, Carmen Sandiego comes in a very close second, if not surpassing it. The games basically were educational, originally about Geography (Where in the World...), in which the player would try and catch the greatest thief in the world, Carmen Sandiego. There was an early '90s gameshow which I followed faithfully, and one of the highlights was Rockapella's song that played at the end of the show (apologies for the video, which is just clips strung together to the song). A few years later, there was a Saturday morning dramatic cartoon with the same basic premise and starring sibling detectives trying to catch Carmen. To this day, I think of Carmen Sandiego as the greatest fictional thief ever and basically uncatchable. And my love of history and geography was at least partly stoked by these shows (and games).

4. Gargoyles - First run October '94 to February '97

(apologies for the annoying ad)

The success of the Batman cartoon led to Disney considering making their own cartoon with a more mature bent to take advantage of the pre-teen/teen demographic, and this show worked perfectly for me. I liked it for many of the reasons I liked Batman - excellent writing, complex plots, darker themes (all keeping in mind I watched this show first-run and in re-runs until I was maybe 16), and I loved the voice cast. Where Batman was comic-books and detective stuff, Gargoyles was medieval history and mythology, and this is another series I could probably watch again and really like.

So that's round 1. Long post, but maybe this rekindled some memories, or interested in some new ones.

Epic Walk Part 2

2008-04-11T00:21:00.005-04:00

Alright, so it occurs to me that I'm not particularly happy with the way the first installment of this tale turned out. So changing the style somewhat, returning it to first person. Names remain changed for the protection of the indeterminately-sinful. ;-)

So here we are, six guys and a blonde haired girl - Tiger, Coyote, Lone Wolf, Ferret, Gopher, Toad, and Dove - gone for a walk at midnight down Turnpike Road out of E-Town. Now, that particular combination becomes important later when the cops get involved, but we weren't thinking like that at the time, of course.

So we'd decided to head out Turnpike Road instead of going past the Masonic Village (Old Folks Home) and turning 'round. Gopher and Toad are mildly iffy about this since they only really came along cause nothing else was going on... the whole "epic walk till morning" thing they're not sure about. Ferret, as is his wont, is all about going wherever, whenever for exploration's sake (hence his climbing Mt. LeConte with me), and Tiger the same. Wolf and Dove are mostly just hanging out and the adventure appeals to them too.

Anyway, so Tiger's disappeared, run off into the woods. At some point, he rejoined us, coming up fairly quietly from behind. Somebody - not sure if it was Dove, Gopher, or Toad - near jumped out of their skin when he showed up next to them and just jumped into the conversation. Especially as we were discussing how this could turn into a horror movie and deciding what order we'd all die in. We decided Ferret would be first, since he was the funniest of us. Dove would be last, being as she's the only girl and you always have to have a girl survive. Couldn't decide whether Wolf would hang on till next-to-last, preserving the couple longer, or earlier in some sort of foolishly-noble self-sacrifice. Either one would work.

It was sometime around this point when somebody piped up that we'd seen an awful lot of red candles in windows (by an awful lot, I mean maybe 3 - we're out of town now and into the Lancaster County non-Amish sticks), which clearly meant we'd somehow stumbled into the Lancaster Co. red-light district... we kept an eye out for awhile for any plain-dress girls with their socks rolled down.

One of the more disconcerting (not the most, no) moments happened when somebody - Toad or Gopher, maybe? - looked over on the side of somebody's house and yelled "Holy S&^T!" Well, we were all wondering what he'd seen, and when he pointed it out we were all a little shaken too - even after we figured out what it really was. Turns out somebody's yard light, illuminating some decoration or other, also had the unfortunate effect of catching a little knotted pull-string in its beam. Which was magnified full sized onto the side of the house looking like a big old noose. Yeesh.

A little further on, we notice some deer statues in somebody's yard. Well, most of us know they're statues. Tiger and Dove aren't so sure and wonder if maybe they're real deer just standing *really* still. Yes, it was kinda rediculous even if it was very dark. Though in their defense, the two of them are from way downtown Philly... I'm not sure they knew what deer looked like outside of the Franklin Institute or textbooks. Oh wait... I was supposed to be defending them. ;-)

Tiger really wants to run up to the deer statues just to make absolutely sure, but we convince him it's a bad idea... we don't wanna be on the wrong end of a shotgun, after all. Instead, I go along with his suggestion that we take a side road up into a woodsy area for awhile, see what it's like or if there's anything interesting up there. The others more or less refuse... it's pretty dark and creepy looking, and Ferret would rather press on because he wants pictures of Three Mile Island, which he's convinced we'll be able to see at some point. So Tiger and I go up the side road by ourselves, we'll catch up with the others in a bit.

Well, it was definitely dark and creepy, and not just a little bit foggy as well. It went on for a while, as roads tend to do, and we followed it to the top of the first rise. There was a Caterpillar of some sort sitting just off the road at some sort of worksite, but that wasn't what caught our attention. Well, I'm not sure what caught our attention, but one of us saw something move in the trees out the corner of our eye, and the other heard something rustle. Already a bit spooked, and not wanting to tarry too long and get real behind the others, we turn around and head back, jogging at a brisk (for me, not him) pace.

Now, as I'm sure has become clear, Tiger's a real mischievous, prankster kinda guy. So we're heading back down Turnpike Road and he says to me, "Ted, what if one of us showed back up without the other and convinced them - Dove would be easiest and funniest - that we thought the other had already caught up? Make them think the other one of us had disappeared somewhere." Well, I thought it would be a fun idea, so we conferred for a bit. Decided I'm not nearly as good at keeping a straight face in something like this, and though they might suspect Tiger more than they would me of pulling the prank, he'd be better at it. So I sat down on the side of the road - not far at this point from the stables where I'd taken a half a class in riding - and waited for about 20 minutes before I started walking again.

Dove called me twice (I think, or was it thrice?), trying to figure out what had happened to me. The first two times I answered... "Where are you, Ted?" (or something to that effect) she asked, in a fairly-concerned voice. I responded with a kind of unintelligible groaning and some heavy breathing before hanging up. After the first two times, I just refused the call.

To Be Continued...
Next Time: Peeing on a church, random creepy yokel, Three Mile Island, and the Pepsi Machine Mirage.

Coyote Goes to Meet the Sun

2008-03-26T09:58:00.004-04:00

Coyote and Tiger were playing chess one night when they decided to go on an Epic Walk. Well, I say Coyote decided, but it was mostly Tiger and Coyote was up for it. They decided to leave at the witching hour and walk in one direction until they met Sun. So then they went to round other people up from the dorm. Ferret was willing, but he always likes long wanderings at any hour, so that wasn't surprising. Gopher and Toad both said they'd come along, but Rabbit said he was feeling tired and wanted to sleep. "Call me when you need picked up, you won't make it as far as Sun" he told them. All the rest in the dorm weren't interested and most thought Coyote and Tiger were crazy.

Tiger wanted Lone Wolf to come along too, but knew he would be a hard sell. So Coyote suggested convincing Dove first - she liked random stuff like that, and if they could get her on board, she had a good shot of convincing Wolf. After all, she's not your typical Dove, too playful and mischievous for that, just like Lone Wolf is too anti-social to fit with any one pack long-term. Funny how couples work that way. So they went down to the Nest of the Great Jay, where Dove and Wolf were working until the witching hour anyway. Ferret, Gopher, and Toad wandered off to snag some snacks while Coyote and Tiger talked to Dove. "Come with us," they said, "we're going to walk until we meet Sun. We'll fun, and Wolf doesn't hang out with us enough anyway. We'll leave after you get off work."

Well, it took a little, but not too much, cajoling by Dove, but Lone Wolf agreed to come along with the crew. He hates Gopher and Toad, though he tolerates Toad for use as a target of abuse. The rest he liked, and Dove quite a bit of course. So the crew came back right before close and hung around while Wolf closed the store up and Dove helped him finish up. They needed to go back and change, which Ferret and Tiger grumbled about, but understood. So with all that taken care of, the seven friends set off.

Dove and Ferret started singing Les Miserables as they walked down the streets of the Virgin Queen City, and Coyote joined in. Then they all switched to The Lumberjack Song, which Tiger and Gopher led while the others chimed in. Well, I say led, but it was more tried to remember as best they could. Lone Wolf didn't sing, but was definitely amused by all this, and Toad followed along as best he could.

They hadn't picked a direction for sure yet, but had decided to walk out of Town on High Street. As they walked by Peace Alley, Wolf and Tiger staged a fight while Ferret took a picture. Then Dove climbed on some statue. This sort of thing would, of course, continue all night. The seven walked on, past the train station, and came to a fork. Decision time. To the left, a fairly well-lit street leading up to (and eventually past) the Old Folks home. To the right, a darker fork, heading out through some light woods into the Red Rose countryside, eventually perhaps to the River. A council. Toad and Gopher were fairly unconcerned about which fork - Gopher was getting cold, but with some needling convinced himself to stay. Ferret, Tiger, and Coyote were all about the right fork, but Dove quailed - theatrically, being a Theatre bird as she was. Wolf was convinced to go right, and Dove went along - insisting that none of the guys sneak off into the woods to jump out, as Tiger had been suggesting.

So right they went, Tiger leading the way. Then he ran off into the darkness, leaving the others behind.

Superpowers!

2008-03-04T23:31:00.003-05:00

Right then, so it's been a little bit since I posted anything, eh? Bet you lot were thinking Coyote had gone to ground, nothing worth talking about anymore, and you'd finally be rid of him, didn't you?

Sorry, it won't be that easy. :-P

So, one of the things I've been talking about with people semi-lately is the idea of superpowers, and what would yours be if you could choose them? Unlike my previous post, which tested you, this is a time for you to be creative yourself. Think about it... if you could have any two superpowers (that is to say, the ability to do something not normally able to be done by humans), what would they be? It can be something out of comics, something you saw on Heroes, or just something you've always wished you could do.

Why superpowers? Well, other than for just goofing off/shooting the breeze, picking a superhuman ability probably says something about your personality. Say you want to be able to be invisible... clearly you want to be able to hide. Is this because you're afraid of conflict and would rather just turn invisible than face it? I'm not much of a psychologist, or at least not at this hour, but I think you get the idea.

Oh yeah, and that picture to your right? Green Lantern + Optimus Prime is simply... fantastic.

Anyway. So my two superpowers would be flight/flying, which I think is a pretty standard wish-fulfillment power and a desire for freedom, and phasing through solid material, a la Kitty Pryde (X-Men) or D.L. Hawkins (Heroes). This is one I think of a lot working at the Roadhouse... how convenient it would be to just phase through people, or objects, but especially people, when I need to get from one place to another, especially on an extremely busy Saturday night. Of course, I've also been told there's more to it than that... the ability to walk through walls without destroying them would be a very useful metaphor for pastoral care, so long as its not abused and you don't walk into the person's (mental, spiritual) home uninvited and/or cause havoc once you get there.

Ok, that's all for now. Fairly short, to the point. It's really not all about me.

Daemon-ology (no, not Demonology)

2008-01-27T04:19:00.000-05:00

So, I love typologies and trying to figure out how they work, what they mean, etc. Myers-Briggs, Enneagram, various online personality tests, it's all great stuff in my opinion. Maybe it's because I like the idea of being able to point at something and say "ahh, see, that's what I'm *really* like," which of course prevents me from having to do the actual hard work myself. Now whether that's because of laziness or because I fear having to defend myself and would like some sort of "authority" to fall back on, that's perhaps a more difficult question.

Of course, that's a rather negative take on why typologies and the like fascinate me. Hmm...

Another thing I really like, and which is mostly related, is the idea of an outwardly visible representation of the self in animal form. Historically (that is to say, in the history of my white English Christian cultural context), one of the more familiar examples of this was the, well, familiar. Ok, so maybe the familiar isn't the best example I'd like to hold up.

In more modern literature/pop culture, J.K. Rowling and Phillip Pullman probably have the best example of what I'm talking about in their respective Patronus Charms and Daemons. The Patronus is probably the single thing I most wish was real from Harry Potter, a protector you can summon, made of hope and willpower, that takes a form specific to you and your personality. It may or may not be reflective of you specifically (the forms of Harry Potter and Professor Snape's patroni, as example, are not reflective of themselves so much as another extremely important person/protection in their life). I would love to be able to cast the Patronus; if nothing else, the curiosity of how it would appear fascinates me.

And whatever problems I may have with Phillip Pullman's worldview and some of his stances, I adore the concept of the daemons, a physical reflection of a person's own soul. And so, while surfin on the Interwebs last night, Coyote stumbled across this "discover your daemon" test at the Golden Compass Movie website. Fantastic! So, I took the test, and the site determined that my daemon is a fox named Trina. Here, looksee

So, intrepid reader, shall you also take this fun little online test and let the moviefolks tell you what your daemon would be if that world were real? Now of course, I know that as with all online personality type-tests, this one no doubt has problems, weaknesses, and it has a rather limited selection of animals that can be your daemon. For example, of the 30 possible choices, 20 are mammalian (a very common human bias), and none are reptiles (snake, croc, turtle?) or amphibians (frog, toad, salamander?). I am surprised, and rather impressed, that any arthropods were included at all. Still, despite these weaknesses, I did like the quiz. Maybe I'll include some others in the future.

Ta for now!

PLAYOFFS!!!

2008-01-06T13:16:00.000-05:00

Guess what time it is... that's right, NFL Playoffs time!!! And the Titans are finally back in for the first time since 2003, woo-hoo!

Ok, backing up. Coyote *loves* football, especially NFL Football, and most especially the Tennessee Titans. It makes sense of course, being his home-state team and also probably the most epic/literary (no, not the same thing of course) of the NFL teams - and also playing on Nashville's status as the "Athens of the South." Anyway, seeing the Titans return to the playoffs again since being evicted by the accursed Patriots (boo... hiss....) makes Coyote very happy. We'll see how long that lasts.

Oh yes, one more sidenote. The kitty this time is clearly not related to the topic of conversation here, but it makes me happy in a very nerdy way. A cookie for those who know the reference.

So, playoffs. Titans have a very rough row to hoe if we intend to reach the Superbowl, and we have a good shot at losing this first game. I mean it's playoffs, so that's to be expected, but drawing the Chargers first was not what I would have preferred. We played the Chargers just a few weeks ago, and aside from giving up a 14-point lead in the fourth quarter, it was also an extremely physical, you might even say brutal, football game. Both these teams love to play physical, smashmouth football, and it showed a few weeks ago. Raw talent, the Chargers may well have the advantage on offense (ok, almost certainly on offense) - especially since Vince Young's not gonna be 100%. I pray that if he's even 80% Vince gets the start, for everybody's morale and also to get Vince extremely valuable playoff experience. Kerry Collins, despite all the complaining I do when he comes on the field, is a very solid, reliable backup, and if need be put him in if Vince isn't getting it done or aggravates the quad, but start Vince please.

Now defense, I'd say Titans have the edge. Everybody knows about the Titans D-Line, with Vanden Bosch and Haynesworth ruining Phillip Rivers (Chargers QB) day last time, but lets talk linebackers, specifically Keith Bulluck (Titans) vs. Shawne Merriman (Chargers). I've never liked Merriman, not at all, and was not surprised last year when he got suspended for juicing. Ever since then, from what I hear, he's not been the same player, but he still talks the trash. Oh, and he whines. Seriously, saying Jeff Fisher ordered a "hit" on him the last time Titans/Chargers played? Shut the he$% up you whiny baby - you got blocked hard, fair and square, and to make out Fisher as some sort of mafioso is even worse - aside from being the longest-tenured coach in the league, find me a guy that's more classy and respectable in the head coaching position.

Oh, one more thing - Special Teams, specifically kicking. Rob Bironas set (or was it just tied) an NFL record for most field goals in one game. That may be an indictment of the Tennessee offense in one respect, but it's so very nice to have such a reliable kicker, and I wouldn't be surprised to see the game come down to that.

Other thoughts on this week's playoff games.

- Too bad for the Redskins that their season had to end yesterday, but they made it a lot further than I expected them too - playing their hearts out for a murdered teammate only got them so far, but good job to build for the future. Good on the Seahawks, not getting flustered when they began to self-destruct and pulling back together. And oh yeah, a shoutout for the only Seahawks rushing TD and first of the game by Fullback Leonard Weaver, a Carson-Newman College grad! (Why yes, that is my parents' alma mater and my hometown college). Now can the 'Hawks get it done at Lambeau Field? "We want the ball, and we're going to score" indeed!

- Wow, crazy game up in Pittsburgh! It looked like the Jags were gonna run away with things, then the Stillers (err... Steelers) had a huge comeback to take the lead. Couldn't quite close the deal and great job by Jaguars QB David Garrard there at the end, but man what a finish! Sorry to all you Bethany Steeler-fans, but I was rooting Jags. :-)

- Other game tonight, Giants-Bucs, go Gints! Eli Manning doesn't get the respect he deserves, and has had way too much pressure on him since Day 1 - comes with being Peyton's little brother, but it's still not fair. Remember, Big Brother didn't win a playoff until the fourth try - this is number 3 for Little Brother. Winner gets to (hopefully) go to Bid D and knock the Hated Cowboys out of the playoffs.

Enjoy the postseason, and here's hoping for aTitan Superbowl!

Merry Christmas!!

2007-12-24T01:17:00.000-05:00

No LolCat this time, sorry readers. It's Christmas Eve and I'm finally in the Christmas mood. You know what that means... Christmas music! I do love Christmas music, and I'd like to share a few of my favorites. Via YouTube, of course, because what would the blogosphere be without YouTube? Hopefully the links work...

But anyway, yes, I do love Christmas music, the beauty and the hope that they share. And I'm not especially picky about the styles... I'll take your classic belting it out a la Charlotte Church (or a Church choir, heh) and I'll also take some more rocking or unusual stuff - I adore the Trans-Siberian Orchestra, as an example. I also prefer the religious songs, except of course for the goofy ones. I mean, I hear enough about Santa and Rudolph as it is, but here so close to Christmas I'd rather focus on the miracle of God Incarnate, of Immanuel.

Boyz 2 Men O Come O Come Immanuel
- It's funny, I'd never really even heard this song until last Christmas season when it was sung at the Elizabethtown Christmas Service. I'd heard of it, but not actually heard it. This is my favorite version on YouTube because of the haunting nature of it; a powerful voice laying it out would also be great.

Celtic Woman Little Drummer Boy
- A classic of course, and though it may be odd at first glance for women to be singing this song. these women are so incredible; and besides. does it really matter what gender sings it? Just be glad I didn't find Joan Jett's version online - I like that too.

Trans-Siberian Orchestra O Holy Night
- TSO is usually a lot more rocking than this, of course, but this version of O Holy Night was absolutely incredible I thought - the power behind it. I'm used to women singing this one, but that's probly due to church. If done right, this song gives me absolute chills, and I think should always be included in any Christmas event (religious, of course). And I don't know why this text is underlined and can't fix it.

Charlotte Church What Child Is This?
- I maintain that Charlotte Church had (has) one of the very best voices for Christmas songs. Feel free to disagree. This particular song may well be one of my very favorites of all. Go Greensleeves!

Jewel O Little Town of Bethlehem
- Another beautiful singer, and a great song when pondering the circumstances into which Christ was born.

Third Day Do You Hear What I Hear?
- One of my brother's favorite Christmas songs, and I like it too. No scoffing at the "Christian rock" please... I like it and think it works really well for this song. And for those who were looking for the modern Christian rock, these guys are pretty big in that world... like, probably Top 5.

Enya Silent Night (Irish)
- Everybody's heard the English, and many no doubt have heard the German. So why not go for the Irish Gaelic version for a change? Now, I don't know if the lyrics flashed on the video are true or not, but the song itself is beautiful, which is what really matters.

Gayla Peevey I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
- Ok, so I said I like serious Christmas songs. Well, this novelty song from 1953 just makes me smile. It's silly, goofy, and ridiculous. Kinda like Coyote at times. Enjoy... or cringe, your call.

Lou Monte Dominic the Donkey
- In a similar vein to the Hippo Song, this classic makes me warm and fuzzy. Goofy, silly, but so Christmasy!

The Royal Guardsmen Snoopy's Christmas
- Goofy and fun, absolutely. I mean, it's about Snoopy and the Red Baron! But it also, deeper down, is a very poignant song about the true meaning of Christmas and how we should treat our "enemies." The Christmas Truce in goofy song format? I'm there!

So, there you go readers, a small selection both religious and goofy. What say you, any favorites that I've left out? I'm sure there are.

A Follow-Up tale, and Something Fun too!

2007-12-08T23:51:00.001-05:00

Right, so, it seems to me only fitting that I should post something in follow-up to the meeting that we had, what, a week and a day ago now? My, how time does fly... poor Coyote is feeling pretty beat right now, like an old dog. Therefore, instead of doing what he should be doing (say, finals/papers) he's gonna blog. Logical, no?

We convened, more or less, at Seven of the Clock post meridiem (that would be nineteen hundred hours for you 24-hour folks) in the Quigg worship room, the Gathering Area having not enough seating or the preferred atmosphere for what we were intending. Which, of course, was somewhat nebulous, at least in the outset. Basically, if I understand what happened correctly, we came together to talk about and share our feelings regarding the perceived breaking of trust in the community, and what we hoped to do as a community in order to re-establish said trust so that we could move forward as functional; what we were not intending was a discussion of Robert's situation, or of Marie Vandenbark's history class. Both were obviously very important elements and would have a bearing on what was said understood, but those specific issues were not intended to be the topic of main discussion/sharing. After some brief introduction and a slight bringing up to speed of what had been happening, we entered into a period of worship, with Micki... well, clerking might be one way of putting it, but pastoring would, methinks, be a more apt descriptor of her function, for which I am deeply appreciative. Question was raised regarding the nature of trust and what that would look like, but things didn't really seem to be going anywhere. Then a Friend asked, hoping not out of line, if we could back up a bit. She was, Friend said, not acquainted with everyone in the room and thought it would be beneficial for all (herself included, natch) if we introduced ourselves and, much more importantly, spoke briefly on our connection to all this and why we had come to the community meeting/what each hoped to accomplish. And we did, not going around the room necessarily, but each speaking when moved and in turn.

Turns out, this suggestion was positively *brilliant* and no doubt Spirit-led. It was during this time that it was revealed to me how hurtful the Gossip Blog had been from the outset due to prior connotations of gossip; however well-intentioned, such a Blog could not have helped do some damage. I must concede, with some remorse and shame, that not all share the sense of humor of myself or James Nayler. Who, by the way, outed himself to the community and publicly apologized for his unintended exacerbation of QuakerWorldNow's apparent... difficulties. I too apologized for the community as one of those who "bit" on the Blog, so to speak. Some also spoke to the deeply personal and ongoing attacks they had been subjected to by QuakerWorldNow, including Craig (though QWN did not know who he was specifically) and Erin, as I mentioned last post (and hope she doesn't mind my mentioning). This was helpful for those who were unaware of anything beyond the initial few e-mails and the Gossip Blog e-mail. Some Friends spoke to feeling unsafe and vulnerable at ESR because of the threats they felt they had received; others spoke to their bewilderment regarding how something so simple (in their eyes) could have such an effect. Some came in an attempt to rebuild trust and community; some came seeking safety and support, comfort for their wounds; some came to offer support and hopefully comfort though they might not have known everything. I went that night to support my friends; I went because I wanted a release of the frustration, anger, fear for friends that had been growing as I learned more. I went seeking absolution for the guilt of feeling angry and threatened on behalf of my friends, the guilt that it had been someone else, not me, who had been hurt and felt threatened, (I would rather be a tank [def. 1]) and as I was there I asked for absolution of the shame that grew in me as I heard Friends talking about how the Gossip Blog hurt them unawares.

Sorry, got a bit sidetracked there. Anyway, as I said this suggestion was a very good one and it was an excellent way to get out information and clear the air, in a sense. There was some brief discussion about the community and the raw pain that was in the room was brought up, but honestly I think most of the work was done in the sharing. And... I'm not sure what else to say about the meeting. It went well. I think most people came away feeling very good about it, if not disturbed about what had happened to some people, and some healing certainly took place.

Changing subjects entirely now, since I should post about something more entertaining methinks. So Coyote was on the Interwebs recently surfing about, and look what he found! Now, for those of you unfamiliar with LOLcats, well, there's a perfect example attached to this post actually. But yeah, there it is. A Kitty pidgin Bible, I kid you not. I about fell out of my chair, and not because I was leaning back too far (though that does happen often - the leaning back, not the falling out I mean). Who has the time on their hands... I know it's a wiki, but still, why? Why, I say, "translate" the Bible into something rather ridiculous. I mean, I'm a fan of Lolcats, and if you read my blog you'll no doubt see more (ohs the noes!), but the Bible?! Still, it's funny. Well, for a bit. Read a few verses, heck read a chapter, and see what you think. Hopefully you giggle or guffaw. If not, well, Coyote tries, but does not always succeed.

And, I'm done. Tis late. Goodnight dear readers!

On Anonymity or, Why I Have Been Tired and Frustrated

2007-11-29T22:36:00.001-05:00

So, anybody that's been around ESR of late (say... the past few weeks) is probably aware on some level of the drama and bad feeling that's been caused by the anonymous e-mail from QuakerWorldNow and the follow-ups to that. I'm not going to try and convince you, intrepid reader, of the rightness or wrongness of QWN's actual message, nor will I try and address the situation that led to QWN's e-mail. Well, I say that, but we'll see how successful I am. After all, this whole thing is a big mess for me, as much as anyone else. Well, at least a tempest in a teakettle. Well, at least a light breeze. But I digress. Right, so this will be my take on things and an attempt to put into words some of what I'm feeling about all this.

Warning: I may express some anger/frustration that is not entirely kosher, and I may be sarcastic or ironic, so if you're offput by this, please remember I'm only a weak mortal... and people may need to speak slowly so I can understand.

Coyote was sitting one day, no doubt failing to meditate on God, sacred texts, and Pastoral Care, when he received an e-mail (this being, of course, not your average coyote) from someone who identified him/herself as "QuakerWorldNow." You, reader, may also have received this e-mail, going on at some length about the mistreatment a certain "exiled" student had received from the ESR administration. The tone was, shall we say, less than fully rational and the e-mail in general was somewhat vague and overly emotional - a poor combination, methinks. Well, Coyote's first reaction was intense curiosity - who was this nonny mouse that was semi-coherently railing against his adoptive institution?

You see here the problem from the outset, dear reader - instead of focusing on the message that Ms. Mouse was trying to communicate, Coyote was focused on the writer's identity. What can I say, I am a curious person?

Still, Coyote is not entirely without compassion, and could sense that there was much pain behind QuakerWorldNow's e-mail and wished to engage Ms. Mouse in order to attempt a dialogue and perhaps offer up some help and resources. Now, in the interests of full disclosure, he sent the response four days after QWN's initial e-mail, which as we all know is a lifetime for the internet and e-mail communication. Actually, here is my e-mail in all it's lengthy glory. Feel free to skip it if desired, but I post it here so that you, dear reader, can judge whether Coyote misstepped too greatly. It will be in italics and dark blue for your ease of identification.
Greetings to... whomever you are.

Perhaps I'm rather late in responding to this, but I've read, and reread, and analyzed, and thought about your e-mail for some time now and have some thoughts of my own I'd like to share. I confess that you have me at a disadvantage here - you know who I am, but I don't knowwho you are, and so I can only pray that my pragmatic and perhaps overly blunt response doesn't rub you too much the wrong way. After all, I wouldn't want to be seen as in collusion with the Evil Ones (Tm). Anyway, the point is that I may come across as a bit adversarial, so I apologize in advance.

First, I wonder about your choice to send this e-mail anonymously, yet only to a select number of students - and an odd collection as well. There's a whole series of problems this raises for me. My initial reaction to this e-mail was "Who is this?" not "Oh poor Robert and fellow student" which I think was probably not your intention. If you feel comfortable enough in e-mailing those of us who you have chosen (after all, it clearly wasn't to the whole community since Lauren, Craig, Trish, among others weren't on the list), then why do you not feel comfortable in revealing your identity? You mentioned that "some students may not accept my words..." yet some (like me) find it difficult to hear the words without knowing the speaker... make sense?

After all, this isn't a message board, or online community where you can lob bombs and leave with no true repercussions, but an actual physical community of people who fellowship, learn, worship, live, and love together - if we are truly an embodied community, even just a
select few whom you have named, why do you feel like we even *can* allow you to go unidentified? I don't mean this in a "Big Brother" way, but a loving community needs to know who is hurting so that it can help in healing, or at least avoid unintended further damage.

Which leads into my second point I guess. Your e-mail is very vague... sure, I and many others here know at least some level of Robert's situation, but to take that for granted is perhaps not the best of ideas. An example: one of the people you e-mailed, Tonda, has been more or less out of touch with the ESR community this semester... understandably, as she's in Minnesota (I think) with her fiance. What this means is that Tonda had no idea any of this was going on... your e-mail was the first she'd heard about it, and as it was rather short on details (not to mention... misleading, which I'll get to later) all she knew was that somebody was gone from ESR, and at least some students appear(ed) to be calling for Jay Marshall's head on a stick. First person she called, Craig, also had no idea, since he hadn't got the e-mail. Now, she's since had it somewhat cleared up, so no fear there, but you see my (rambling) point. For those who don't have the gnosis, this e-mail was both disturbing and not particularly helpful. Which is okay if you're just letting out grief, but usually letting off steam is best done to those who have some idea of what's going on. Heck, *I* don't know all the details of Robert's exodus, and I think it unlikely that you do either - no offense.

Speaking of, I wonder why it is you keep referring to Robert as an "exile?" He wasn't expelled, but rather withdrew on his own terms (more or less his own terms)... no matter how badly the administration may have treated Robert, they did not force him out the door, and to suggest that they did smacks of... rumor-mongering, at best. Marie Vandenbark is not the first adjunct that Bethany has had the misfortune of hiring, being as they are in a bad way with the loss of two beloved professors last year, and somewhat flagging support from their denomination. You may have heard from Micah or some others about the New Testament professor they had last semester and who isn't back. Doesn't mean damage wasn't done while he was here, but he's gone now. Likewise I expect with Vandenbark... if she's as terrible as everyone says and the evaluations/letters support this, I doubt Bethany will bring her back. Not that that helps Robert, or you apparently, but Bethany/ESR aren't totally unresponsive to their students. Hmm... got off-topic there, somewhat. Well, perhaps not.

Anyway, I guess the last question I have for you is what do you hope to accomplish here? If you're in need of Pastoral Care regarding these many issues (and the underlying ones that I sense are present as well), why contact your fellows anonymously when it's hard to sympathize with a nonny mouse? If you want us to join you in letting ESR/Bethany know that we feel Robert was treated unjustly, again, it would be nice to know who you are but more importantly, what exactly the injustice is here you're talking about. Mentioning "strange behavior" doesn't tell much... and accusing the administration (who? Jay? Tim? Joanna? Sue? President Bennet? the administration are not a lock-step monolithic entity) of "hypocrisy" is somewhat empty when you don't tell us how they're being hypocritical. These purposes so far are worthy (at least in one case, unknown in the other), and I cansupport either one. However... however... if you're simply seeking to "stir the pot" and create a tempest in a tea-pot by accusing the Dean and company of shenanigans... well, I find that at least inappropriate, if not downright un-Quaker (let alone un-Christian). The dramatic nature of your message, the constant sanctification you're giving Robert and demonization of... let's go with Jay, here... leads me to ponder this. I mean, no offense, but what does Robert's delicious cookies (they were!) and his support of your own settling-in have to do with his ability to handle conflict and incompetence among professors? Maybe, like too many Quakers historically, he decided to take his toys and go home. I don't actually believe that, but I know Robert. Does everyone that you sent this to know him enough to not jump to that conclusion?

A couple phrases stuck out to me that I'd like to ask you about. You imply early on that young people are not listened to at ESR... and I wonder what leads you to feel that way? For myself, I have felt nothing but supported and encouraged to explore and take on roles since my arrival here, regardless of my age... indeed, I am often the one who defers to others (fellow students that is) because of my age, much to the chagrin of some. Now, if you're referring to faculty or administration, well the power structure is rather different... after all, we are in a graduate program; however, I don't think that's any less true for say, Summer (30ish), Paul/Trish (late 40s I believe), or Mickey/Deb (??? don't wanna guess terribly wrong). Still, you apparently feel that your age makes you not be listened to, and I'd encourage you to explore that, see what others feel about it. Later, you refer to Robert as "...forced to withdraw from the seminary he so loved and wanted to be a Quaker emmissary..." and I wonder why you feel that he can no longer be a Quaker emissary? I mean, did Chuck Fager graduate from ESR (maybe he did, I don't know)? Or the Executive/General Secretaries of many Yearly Meetings? I'm certainly not belittling an ESR degree, but being a Quaker emissary doesn't require a set of letters after your name... but again, I wonder why it is you put it that way?

Alright, my e-mail is very lengthy and for that I apologize, but you raise many questions for me. One more thing to say, and I know this is nitpicky, but w/e. I wish you'd taken more time in writing this, spelling/grammar, general sentence structure, etc, just to make things easier for everyone to understand. Sorry, can't help being obnoxious about it. I'd just like to end with a hope that you don't feel the need to actually leave over this... perhaps this is the straw breaking the camel's back, and you have many other legitimate reasons for leaving, but this sort of rash action, if rash it be is not very... Quakerly, no?

Salaam,
Jonathan

Right, so there you have it, dear reader. Fairly lengthy e-mail Coyote wrote, eh? I'll admit, I was rather proud of it. Imagine my dissapointment when QWN's response was a mere two paragraphs (20 sentences) of dismissive attitude towards my own intelligence and understanding of the situation, and more vague - yet sinister - accusations against both Jay Marshall and Marie Vandenbark. I'd repost it, too, but Coyote doesn't feel like being threatened with legal action - or worse, as some have been.

Ok, anyway, so there's that. Most of the thoughts in Coyote's e-mail still stand. There's more, though. Shortly after this - two days, actually - a fellow mischief-maker, James Nayler, sent me an invitation to an ESR Gossip Blog. Oh, yes, shudder dear reader, for it is this which has caused almost as much unhappy divisiveness as QuakerWorldNow's e-mail. You see, the original intent behind the Gossip Blog, which "fills a much needed gap in the community" was ironic, sarcastic, and taking the piss out of the whole situation. Fans of Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart, or Edmund Blackadder may be familiar with the concept. As Coyote will be the first to tell you, "libel and defamation" clearly do not "fill a much needed gap." The whole point, is that QWN is being disruptive by slinging mud, so why not point this out and have some fun by accusing the ESR administration of being responsible for the death of Anna Nichole Smith - tarring and feather to follow upon Jay Marshall's return from Kurdistan.

Right, so there was that. Coyote and some others having fun on a goofy blog, then someone (emphasis here on one) has to come along and piss in their Wheaties. Ok, so the actual circumstances leading to the taking down of the blog are more complicated than that - and no, it was not QuakerWorldNow or any of the other pseudonyms that were the direct cause, though, as with all of this, they were the root problem. And yes, I will agree with James Nayler that it was ultimately the right move - after all, he/we had misunderestimated (ooh, like that?) the depth of pain/brokenness that QWN is dealing with and that was leading him/her to register several pseudonyms and attack the blog - and individuals, not knowing who was behind it. Which, of course, was hurtful to others who were caught in the... well, crossfire isn't the right word, maybe drive-by would be better. Make sense, dear reader? I hope so, because it still somewhat confuses Coyote.

So I'm frustrated and upset. Because somebody threw a bomb into our community and isn't willing to take responsibility for it. We can't even reach out and try to begin the healing process we'd like to with this person, because there is a lot of pain there, and difficulty with authority. I may be coming across as a bit of a jerk, I hope not, but I do want this person to get help if they want it. That's why we have a Pastoral Care Committee, that's why we have Student Meeting for Business, that's why we have resources. But... ooh, here Coyote's gonna be bad, and not assume the best of someone... what if, dear reader, QWN doesn't want healing? I mean really, what does the nonny mouse want to accomplish? The adjunct gone? Who would that serve? Certainly not the people that need that class, need it now, and are willing to carry on through and make the best of it. What will you tell that person, "Oh, sorry you need this class to graduate when you want to and follow God's call for your life, but we're going to cancel it and not let you finish the course because many people can't get along with the instructor?" (And, for that matter, exacerbate the situation by aggrandizing the instructor's... eccentricities)

What makes it worse is this divisiveness and confusion is spreading... infecting, you might say, some other folks at ESR - specifically the new folks, who are new to this community and were blindsided by this. I'm sorry to have to be so blunt about it, but that's how I feel. I don't blame them for talking about this as much as they are - after all, it was somebody close to them and who had been very kind who left ESR under mysterious circumstances at best. I don't blame them, I just wish... I don't know what I wish. Maybe that's going too far. Where was I? Oh yes. Maybe this is just Coyote being jealous and defensive, but dang it I like these new people and I don't want them getting half-truths and adding to the dissatisfaction some of them are feeling. And worst of all, oh worst of all, is when people I care about, who are vitally active and enriching members of this ESR community are feeling forced out, attacked and belittled, or are looking forward to getting out of here with no bittersweet, only yearning. All because one person (under different names) is attacking blogs (yes, more than one, see my dear friend QuakerScholar), declaring deeply spiritual fFriends as "rage-filled," and (possibly, if Coyote's nose is as good as he believes) two-facedly taking personal credit for taking down the ESR Gossip Blog.

Right. Calming down. Happy trickster, right? So tomorrow night there will be a Community Meeting to try and address some of these concerns. I hope the pseudonymous nature of this (not truly anonymous, as Julie corrected me) and why someone in our community feels the need to act pseudonymously will be addressed. What I hope for is that QuakerWorldNow comes and identifies him/herself so we can stop this nonsense. What I hope even more though is that some of my new friends will attend - I know they're tired of this, but it would be healthy for everyone.

Sorry Coyote's story began trailing at the end there. It's late, I'm tired. My head hurts. I should be doing Old Testament work. Or Spiritual Prep. work. Or Pastoral Care work. Or something other than this depression-inducing topic.

Hope to see folks tomorrow night!

In the beginning - the First Tail

2007-11-26T02:24:00.000-05:00

So, all things (well, nearly all things, more on that later perhaps) have a beginning, and blogs are one of them. Now, normally in stories I prefer to begin in media res, but since I'm as much a character in these tails as a narrator, I figure it's fitting that I begin with a word of introduction. So, greetings, and welcome to Coyote's humble - and virtual - abode. The truth behind the keyboard is that I am Jonathan Goff, ESR Student. If you know me, great! If you don't, well, I may as well be Paleface Coyote, aye?

So what's in a name? Specifically, why did I choose this identity when, well, I'm not really all that Coyote-like? After all, I've been the straight man my whole life, and never been accused of being that trickster-ish. Well, not outwardly anyway. And yet... and yet... mischievousness and frivolity is inherent to who I am, especially now. Maybe it's too much Douglas Adams and Eddie Izzard. Maybe too much Dr. Who... notice all three are British and at least semi-nerdy (apologies to Eddie Izzard). It's that dry humor, taking the piss out of the world, that I appreciate about a trickster figure. Maybe it's being here at a seminary and talking such heavy material, doing deep work. There's something liberating about being a bit ridiculous every now and again, especially when I know how to stop it and be serious. I'm still the straight man, but with a twinkle in my eye and a snide comment at the ready. I appreciate a trickster, someone who makes others look ridiculous - and isn't afraid to look ridiculous himself.

Besides, Coyote is nothing if not mutable - trickster, yet often culture hero too - see the bringing of fire. And that fits me, who's still struggling to find my place in the world and who I am. I, too, am mutable, and have never really been an insider wherever I go; or, no, that's not right. Well, it implies the wrong thing. What I mean is I never quite fit in wherever I am - a Yankee when I'm home, a Southerner when I'm in the North; a conservative here, a liberal back home. I've talked about this some with folks, my perpetual uniqueness. But I'm wandering... as tales tend to do.

Thus Coyote. Why Paleface? Well, funny story actually. I was looking up synonyms for trickster on thesaurus.com for a fuller name, and under the jester and joker entries it listed pale face and paleface. "Hmm..." I thought, "paleface sounds good," and I kept it. Plus of course it describes me literally. Then I looked up paleface on Wikipedia (source of all truth and knowledge, of course) just to see what it turned up. Hmm... a "usually insulting term" sometimes used for white people. Hey, that's perfect for me, eh? After all, using the moniker Coyote is itself rather, well, pretentious white-boy of me, isn't it? I'm not a southwesterner, nor are there a lot of coyotes in East Tennessee. For that matter, the only Native tribe I can claim descent from, the Cherokee, do not (to my knowledge), have Coyote as a major figure in their mythology; Rabbit is the Cherokee trickster (a la Bugs Bunny no doubt). Yet I like Coyote, and coyotes, and I am North American after all. So taking an insulting name as part of "my" own makes sense as recognition of this.

So that's me. Paleface Coyote. Like all Tricksters, both ridiculous and yet deadly serious at times. Greetings!

Oooh, looky here

2007-11-20T00:31:00.000-05:00

Well, I have a blog now. A real one, that is. I'll post something to it real later... when I'm not supposed to be going to sleep so I can drive home tomorrow morning. Right.